To start with, We are all unique individuals. We have different personalities and different behaviours brought about by our upbringing and beliefs. What may be ridiculous to you may not be that of a big deal for others. What you consider normal may be unusual for others. What may seem wrong for you may not be as bad for others.
There really is no common standard when it comes to human behavior that’s why it’s a bit unfair to judge people at face value. It’s not fair to write people out just because they don’t fit your standards.
Secondly, keep observations to yourself: One of the most common mistakes we make in misjudging people is that we can’t keep our mouths shut. The moment we hear someone who share our opinion about another person, we can’t resist the temptation of making it known.
Yes, this is how gossip starts and it eventually spreads when you find more people who share that same opinion.
More so, look at yourself before judging others. Often we are so quick to judge that we don’t realize that just like them, we too are not perfect. Everyone has flaws and weaknesses, so who are we to judge if we are technically equals?
Are you sure that you’ve passed the standard by which you judge others with?
Furthermore and very important, look for the good in people and not the other way round. Everyone is capable of being good and kind and I honestly believe that. Even the worst criminals do have a good side before they screwed up. Instead of being a fault-finder, why not be a good-seeker?
Our normal tendency is to find fault in people and that includes me but I’ve learned that if you want to be happy and fulfilled, you have to get rid of all the negatives in your life and that includes the way you look at people.
Lessons: One of the keys to happiness is having friends who will be there for you no matter what and you won’t be able to win friends if you’re too judgmental. Though there are bad people but we also have a negative part. I believe there are way more good people around that we can build relationships with but you will be robbing them of that opportunity if you quickly write them off because they don’t fit your standards. Don’t make a habit of misjudging people.
By Abdulmumin Abdullahi